Last Sunday I got an opportunity to read in the Church. One of the prayers of faithful was for equality on all fronts and the differences of caste, creed, ethnicity, or class give way to human values and love. This started revolving in my head for quite a sometime now. If I look around and analyze, we all know that this is right and should be followed by everyone. But is it in reality?
Many of you will also agree that that equality should be practiced, but are not actually practicing it. Many of you will agree to me that it looks good in theory, but not practically. I don't know why are saying this. It things are not practically possible then why do we agree with its theoretical feasibility at the first place. You just did that. I have not seen other cultures other than that of India, but as I gather from friends/read, I understand this gap doesn't exist in there. Are we Indians missing something?
We all know corruption is bad and should not be encouraged, and we also know application filed through an agent gets processed not only faster and is hassle free. But that's not limited till this. I agree, we can't do much of this system, until an unless we overhaul the whole system. But we can do something of what is under our control.
These days, many of my friends are discussing marriage and is a hot topic in my conversations with them most of the time. And may be when to my library in search of a novel that I am looking for for a long time but still don't get it, I pick up another book called "Love will follow.... Why the Indian Marriage is burning" by Shaifali Sandhya. I would recommend this book to all those who are contemplating marrying in the near future. It is an psychological study of the author who herself is a clinical psychologist.
Her analysis of Indian marriage is so very true in many aspects. In India, youngsters are well aware of what is going to follow and they would get into contract love affairs that will end with time or impose on themselves a self-curfew, and later only to get married as per the customs and traditions. The book covers lot many aspects of marriage and expectations they come with. Alarmingly, 1/3rd of the marriages seem to be working. The rest are still holding on for one reason or the other, or those who dared the society's taboo over divorce, separate. With the Independence level of females increasing and participation of women in major decision making, the age-old practice of match-making and marriage is falling apart. The difference between today and 25 yrs back is dangerously wide and we need to accept that.
But still many of us will continue to embrace (or I would say experiment with) marriage with a partner of our caste, creed, ethnicity or class, with the hope that Love will follow. But what if it doesn't follow? Remember Love never follows the yardsticks you used in selecting your marriage partner. If you are unhappy with your job, you have the liberty to look outside for opportunities.You can't do that in marriage. But still...............
Few days back, I heard a friend saying 'Jis gali jaana hi nahi, us gali ka patha kyun puchna?' (Why do you ask the address of the lane, you don't wish to go?), But I would ask, what if you reached that lane already? In today's world, it is difficult to keep away from that lane and many of you must have walked by that lane. Some subtly, some seriously. So what now? We still feel that it is wrong and we try putting a full stop. We design our own breakup, some one-sided or some mutual, some harsh or some mild. But they are all painful, however they are.
Another friend of mine said "Sacrifice is greater than Love", but is that sacrifice really called for. As far as I understand is that love never hurts, its the absence of it that hurts. After all it is your life that you are going to sacrifice. It is your happiness you are going to compromise.
I again say, our behaviour towards equality issues is not limited to this only. Its everywhere.
You might loudly disagree with everything I wrote here, but deep down there would be having that feeling within you that agrees to me. These are my thoughts and how I look at life. I just want to share them to my readers, however small my reader-base is.
Many of you will also agree that that equality should be practiced, but are not actually practicing it. Many of you will agree to me that it looks good in theory, but not practically. I don't know why are saying this. It things are not practically possible then why do we agree with its theoretical feasibility at the first place. You just did that. I have not seen other cultures other than that of India, but as I gather from friends/read, I understand this gap doesn't exist in there. Are we Indians missing something?
We all know corruption is bad and should not be encouraged, and we also know application filed through an agent gets processed not only faster and is hassle free. But that's not limited till this. I agree, we can't do much of this system, until an unless we overhaul the whole system. But we can do something of what is under our control.
These days, many of my friends are discussing marriage and is a hot topic in my conversations with them most of the time. And may be when to my library in search of a novel that I am looking for for a long time but still don't get it, I pick up another book called "Love will follow.... Why the Indian Marriage is burning" by Shaifali Sandhya. I would recommend this book to all those who are contemplating marrying in the near future. It is an psychological study of the author who herself is a clinical psychologist.
Her analysis of Indian marriage is so very true in many aspects. In India, youngsters are well aware of what is going to follow and they would get into contract love affairs that will end with time or impose on themselves a self-curfew, and later only to get married as per the customs and traditions. The book covers lot many aspects of marriage and expectations they come with. Alarmingly, 1/3rd of the marriages seem to be working. The rest are still holding on for one reason or the other, or those who dared the society's taboo over divorce, separate. With the Independence level of females increasing and participation of women in major decision making, the age-old practice of match-making and marriage is falling apart. The difference between today and 25 yrs back is dangerously wide and we need to accept that.
But still many of us will continue to embrace (or I would say experiment with) marriage with a partner of our caste, creed, ethnicity or class, with the hope that Love will follow. But what if it doesn't follow? Remember Love never follows the yardsticks you used in selecting your marriage partner. If you are unhappy with your job, you have the liberty to look outside for opportunities.You can't do that in marriage. But still...............
Few days back, I heard a friend saying 'Jis gali jaana hi nahi, us gali ka patha kyun puchna?' (Why do you ask the address of the lane, you don't wish to go?), But I would ask, what if you reached that lane already? In today's world, it is difficult to keep away from that lane and many of you must have walked by that lane. Some subtly, some seriously. So what now? We still feel that it is wrong and we try putting a full stop. We design our own breakup, some one-sided or some mutual, some harsh or some mild. But they are all painful, however they are.
Another friend of mine said "Sacrifice is greater than Love", but is that sacrifice really called for. As far as I understand is that love never hurts, its the absence of it that hurts. After all it is your life that you are going to sacrifice. It is your happiness you are going to compromise.
I again say, our behaviour towards equality issues is not limited to this only. Its everywhere.
You might loudly disagree with everything I wrote here, but deep down there would be having that feeling within you that agrees to me. These are my thoughts and how I look at life. I just want to share them to my readers, however small my reader-base is.
No comments:
Post a Comment
If you liked the post, I would like to know.
Even if you didn't, I will appreciate your criticism.
Thanks!